


break it to me gently

by dahkkun



Category: Dreamcatcher (Korea Band)
Genre: Bora mentioned, F/F, why is the setting always be on beds, written without sleep sorry if messy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-09
Updated: 2021-01-09
Packaged: 2021-03-13 04:40:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,499
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28647693
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dahkkun/pseuds/dahkkun
Summary: siyeon liked to believe she hasn't fallen yet
Relationships: Kim Minji | JiU/Lee Siyeon
Comments: 1
Kudos: 39





	break it to me gently

**Author's Note:**

  * For [renrenee](https://archiveofourown.org/users/renrenee/gifts).



> this was inspired at late 3 am with ren and i hate how she triggered me to write this like a madman though it's only short
> 
> check out her works too! hope you enjoy this mess once again! :)

_ Suddenly, it sank in. _

It never really was intentional, Siyeon would like to infer, as she sweeps her eyes at Minji's bare back that was facing her closet at the corner of their shared room. 

Burning, was abruptly an action she would return to once all of this is over. She wouldn’t let this flame within her extinguish, stubborn as she had become, and would allow it to consume her whole. And maybe it would be enough to compensate for the empty rattling of her ribs that’s lacking the heart to occupy the hole; to let it beat itself alive and disperse throughout the lonesome echo it came along.

Her fingers twitched. This was probably the first time her fingers are dying to touch a skin that’s beyond bachands and ears that she squeezes deftly, and how she begs eyes to look at her with more than just platonic motives and regard, and maybe how the laugh she dismisses usually as validating her humor suddenly becomes something she basks in delight more than she could have ever even imagined herself falling for. And perhaps it is also why she was dying to let herself succumb into arms that are warm and comfortable; her favored solace and life, the realization daunting onto her slowly as she imagines someone else other than her to indulge themselves in her haven has carved itself a mark of torment.

A lump of nervousness, she struggles to swallow, and in her path towards insanity she can sense herself lurching forward towards a dead end, where if she does cross over the cliff she was scared to take a leap of faith with, will she ever connect to the other end without the chance of plummeting down into the canyon called  _ feelings _ ? Siyeon would never know, then again if she does take this risk, she could find her answer right then and now.

But she didn’t

And so she lets the shaft of their cheap nightlight send her into a trance, maybe fool herself she was focused on the ambiance than the lingering, flickering figure of Minji who’s now dressed and is padding her way to their huge duvet on the floor because they aren’t exactly luxurious to buy themselves a framed bed yet, nor are they permanent enough to afford one.

Minji smiles, and oh did Siyeon try not to whimper in the middle of it all. It’s the very same she gives no matter her circumstance, the genuinity that aches her inwards deep, holding her captive just by a bare breath.

Siyeon scooted, giving Minji space to settle in and together they lay down, side by side, for the last time.

She turns, staring at Minji who was looking at their ceiling that’s decorated with the galaxy lights they bought out of curiosity a few years ago, and perchancely because they believe in fate as a joke to convince themselves that whatever obstacles they confront, they will always succeed. Siyeon also finds it cute that Minji wasn’t fond of the dark, saying she isn’t actually a fan of its embrace and the lack of company it exudes. It reminded her of the times she was alone, and Siyeon entirely understands, though on her end, sleeping under the influence of luminescence, wasn't appealing enough as it disturbs her stimuli of rest.

Siyeon extends a limb, albeit conscious in spite of the familiarity and accustomed gesture they’d always do years ago when it’s time to retire for the day, and grabs gently for Minji’s forearm as she pinches the hand.

When she felt Minji flinch under her stroke, Siyeon tittered.

“Nervous?” she prompted, mostly because she can’t take the silence that suffocates her and the hours remaining she frets to count.

She didn’t miss the flicker of Minji’s troubled eyes, and finally shifted from her position to face Siyeon.

A heart ached but neither know whose.

Probably because it was simultaneous enough to be considered as one.

“Well,” Minji starts, caressing the hand atop hers that eases her, “I’d never see myself to be leaving our apartment anytime soon, but here we are”

_ Ours… _

“Here we are,” Siyeon grimaces, hiding the pain that’s creeping her jaw and locked itself before she can even manage to jut out.

The fingers that was stretching a thin patch of skin trembled, the dread constricting her lungs at the loss she’ll be receiving sooner through the waters, her thoughts that are beginning to dim and blind her days, and the warmth that will soon dissipate in the air replaced with numbing forlorn that will befall.

She hates it.

A word she would never usually describe scenarios that are inevitable yet it felt so fitting to her pitiful self.

It doesn’t even encompass the course of emotions toppling her illogical.

“I still can’t believe it’s happening,” Minji resounds, eyes connected with Siyeon’s before the latter can even catch her respiration that has been cut short as she occupied her mind with every little details she can install in her memories to keep, (Minji's lip mole, the arch of her brows that lines her comfort, her nose that's adorable to pinch sometimes when they're playful, her eyes that holds a universe of secrets and blessings of the galaxy that only she could ever grasp, her plump lips with a saturated and dizzying color of peach that's incredibly hard to resist and give chaste if chanced), that even her camera that’s propped up near her bedside can’t even do her features justice, it races to its maximum registration, and before she can realize the tears pooling around her eyes, Minji was already crushing her weak by the hold she was given immediately.

Minji chuckled, seemingly unaware of Siyeon’s other reason for why she suddenly broke down in less than words that could have ever comprehend the situation, “Why are you crying?”

"N-Nothing," Siyeon lies, protecting either her pride or her will to be this close with Minji. The relationship that could fall apart if one insists on a decision that can change everything.

"I'll just miss you,"  _ it's more than that _ .

"You can always visit me and Bora y'know? No need to miss me much," She grins, and it only brought more suffering than reassurance, knowing Minji will leave her for her girlfriend of two years. But she's never one to say otherwise, because she's not hers to persist Minji to stay to begin with.

"I-I know"

"You can even have all of the space here when I'm gone. Benefits the both of us, no?"

Siyeon can only muffle a nod, eyes fixed on Minji's and not willing to let go.

Minji was still fondling with Siyeon's hands as Siyeon massages still, and only brought a hand up when she fixes Siyeon's hair that's disheveled to the edge of her frame.

"I'll never be too far," Minji adds, smoothing the other's creasing brow that bunches up a valley at the center.

Siyeon concurs, hushly replying because she can't say anything else unless she has the courage enough to face the confession she's been avoiding to make.

Which doesn't explain why she abruptly shifts and reaches for their light to shut it off.

"Siyeon?" Minji asks, confused, because they never close their synthetic gleaming nebula, and Siyeon insisted before that it was okay that they leave it open for Minji considering her tiny fear of the dark.

But Minji didn't get to retort nor to whine even just jokingly.

Because suddenly Siyeon was on top of her, hands on either side of her face, her hair curtaining the expression Minji can't see and the drums in her ears throbbing against it with unexplainable flush dusting her cheeks.

"Can I…" Siyeon whispered, visibly shaken by her action too. She lifts her head, and Minji had always thought of Siyeon as beautiful, with her charms that are likeable and unmatched traits she finds herself being attached; but seeing her like this, under the natural moon's beam that silhouettes edging features which emphasizes coarse and smoothness, she was marvelous and direly ethereal.

Minji was stunned, vision just occupied with Siyeon.

Siyeon. 

Siyeon.

_ Siyeon _

"Is it alright with you that I commit to something?"

Minji barely registers the words. She only followed her instincts by agreeing nonetheless.

The next thing that sunk in, were the lips against hers that shrouds them in their own night lit sky.

It was hesitant, unsure, and maybe a tiny bit regretted when coldness seeped in.

And before Siyeon can stop, her mind on the brink of dreading her fault, Minji protrudes and returns to the disappearing distance they manifested, wrapping her arms around Siyeon's neck instinctively as if she had been waiting for this for far too long, bring her closer, closer, closer, and tighter until they can no longer seek reason. Until they bend and break, and they overflown.

"I'm sorry"

And they kissed again. To keep the stifle that lets them stay above somehow, despite already reaching the ocean's floor.

  
  



End file.
